state sponsored nannies

There is a great system in finland: a family in need may get a state sponsored nanny.
We are such a family. With four children under 3 years old, we are eligible for help couple of times a week, few hours at a time.
These nannies are like god-send. With vast experience they have, i or my hubby need not to worry how babies (or nannies) are doing and we can get a little rest.
During the 90's this service anyhow for some reason was seen as something that can be taken down. I guess it was partly due to the idea of offering more counseling (which though never happened due to budgets) for parents in need.
A great mistake. Jealous, i listen the nannies talking about the past, when they could spend a whole day with a family, not just few hurried hours. Now, this point has been given a voice in finnish media. There has been two very recent cases of a mother killing her small children here in finland. No need to say how horrifying these news are. Why aren't these families getting the help they need? And what kind of help should it be?
Bring on the nannies, i say. Talking won't always help, but a pair of hands may give for a person deep in the mud a chance to climb up.

twins vs triplets

I belong to a facebook group dedicated for parents of tiplets.
It is necessary. If you only had one baby, i have no patience for your hardships. Twins? I might go through with it, but only another triplet mom will truly get me.
Two babies are easy to manage. You can put one in a sitter, and feed another one. You can even breastfeed two. It is easy to divide your attention between two babies, but try babbling with three babies. You always notice that one has gotten nearly no attention.
I am constantly afraid that my babies will end up socially handicap, since i just can't give them the attention they each individually would deserve.
That is why this morning i was especially happy. Each one of my babies saluted me with a smile, for a first time. I

husbands

It is a well-known fact that innorder for a woman to succeed in her career, she better invest in a supportive husband, or stay single.
I'd say the same rings true for a woman who wills, or must, stay at home with kids.
In order for your time at home to be precious, you need a companion who supports you - both emotionally and financially. He needs to be someone who values your work at home , praises your cooking, admires you as a mother and lets you to be the manager of the homelife - and yet sees you as a woman and supports your personal growth.
Only then you will become a housewife, not a bitter woman who stays at home.

materialism

Having a baby revolves a lot around shopping. Yes, i am partly to blame as i love shopping, but hey, the baby needs all his clothes new every few weeks!
Some people prefer not to spend on babygear as it is used for such a little while.
I say, shop if you can!
Every little thing, no matter if you use it for two weeks, is worthwhile if it makes those two weeks more bearable.
With my first born i got obsessed with the climate change, and carried quilt about my purchases. Then i realized, i won't destroy the world even if i bought all the babygear in it.
It is much bigger guys who work up in the corporate ladder, the investors, who should lead the change.

putting baby on a schedule - gina ford

I am at the point of mommyhood, where i am becoming obsessed about putting the babies into a schedule. I remember it happened exactly at the same time with the toddler: two months mark.
Step in the guru of the baby schedules: gina ford, the author of such books that promise to make you and the baby contented.
Ford tells you exactly what to do and at what hour - or quarter of an hour. She only does not tell you when to feed your baby, but also when you, the mom, should be having your toast and cereal. Some love her, some think her as a load of bullshit.
For me schedules bring a feeling of safety. I do find it funny that i felt the need for schedule with one baby. One baby is easy to take along, i say now. But now with three babies and one toddler, we need one - fast - or i go nuts.
I am not gonna follow ms ford. She is a bit too throughout. But her existence gives me hope that a schedule is possible - not that the baby necessarily needs it, but my sanity does.

inactive babies

It is somewhat pure sadism that babies are born with so undeveloped digestive system. It breaks the heart and a good-night sleep of the parent to watch a squirming, red-faced little person who is clearly in pain.
Burp the baby properly, you may say.
Well, yeah! How do you burp and feed three babies all at the same time?
I am thinking if this phase of tummy problems is a global phenomenon? In cultures where a baby is carried and thus goes with the daily activities of mummy, do babies have these problems? I would think that being in upright position and gently feeling the movements and the smell of the mom might be a preventive action?
Inactivity of a human being seems to start in the western world already as a baby, i think now. Babies are expected to lay down a lot, and be happy. Well, you try laying down all day long, and feel the gas developing...

Please, read my blog about baby products and all things scandinavian at www.whatabrand.blogspot.com.

about nannies

As we have four kids under 3 years old, some professional help around the house is requisite. Thank god the state sponsors us with some help: we have a nanny around the house for few hours couple of times a week.
Various nannies have passed by, and i've got a hint for everyone thinking of getting a nanny.
Do make sure that she is at least 10 years older than you are!
No, i am not saying this because you should be afraid that your husband might get some fantasies about the young and fresh girl running around your home. Neither i am saying this because you might compare your post-preg body to one that has not had the joy of carrying a baby.
I am saying it because i just spent few hours with a nanny eight years my junior.
It was exhusting! A big sis feeling took over me, and i had to babble with her as she'd be my friend.
Now, a nanny is supposed to be a person you need not talk to too much, at least if she is there  because you are exhausted. This dilemma is solved when the nanny is clearly someone out of your generation.

maternal love

As i woke up at 3 am last night, which by the way i do every night, and ventured in to the living room, i took a baby from my hubby's arms. I and the baby went in to the triplets room, and laid down on the bed.
I always try to take one baby to sleep next to me. Poor a is such a good sleeper that he rarely gets the privilege, but b and c are regulars and most of the time fall asleep quite quickly even though if they have given trouble earlier on.
I watched the baby fall asleep. I noticed how big he has gotten, his palms looked like little boys palms, not newborn's. His breathing steadied and a peaceful expression fell on his face. I was full of love towards him, and thought that these moments make waking up at the middle of the night at least somewhat worthwhile.
I say somewhat as i will be more than happy once the boys start sleeping through the night.
I also realised, and was amazed, that maternal love really is such a thing that it is possible to love all one's children equally. It so happened that i did not know which baby i so admired, b or c. But that did not matter, it was my baby and i loved him all the same.

sharing babycare, part 1

What is true and what is not?  That is up to you to decide.
Me and the Hubby, we were okay for two days, exact. Then, at four in the morning "well maybe we get this thing together" -period ended.
"I am with the babies most of the days all day long," he said.
Yes you are, yes i am, i wanted to scream. We've got three of them, plus the toddler.
But it happened what usually happens. I do not do enough, he does too much. Then i got confused, since to my last recall, i do all the time, too.
A little note here, then. What a woman does around the house and the kids, that is of course. What a man does is because it is his will. If he somehow suddenly decides that he won't, the woman should just accept it and maybe give a smile.
What a big load of bullshit!

relationships: how to survive pregnancy as a couple?

we are running out of monet. As triplet pregnancy would not be hard enough on a couple itself, it is a mystery how we gonna support a family of six. It is silly how much strain monet puts on a relationship, how it becomes a personal fault of the other.
yesterday us being poor came down to me eating too much chocolate 😄.
product tip of the day: There is a sale at french kids fashion label, dpam. Check it out at kamppi, sello or internet!

clothes: sad to lose L&B

Swedish Lingon&Blåbär was sold last spring. The deal came about just when the brand known for quality in kids and women's wear also got a hang on funky design.
The deal seems to mean that the story of L&B is finished. The company has joined another brand, Blingo. Far bigger than L&B, i am afraid that the quality will have to give way to quantity.


Product tip of the day: Get your hands on secondhand L&B clothes through huuto.net and secondhand stores.

Food: The biggest obstacle why my toddler isn't eating healthy is myself

While pregnant with the Toddler, I was, as most of the first-time mothers I suppose are, ambitious about her future eating habits. She'd not visit fast food places, she'd have sweets or ice cream once a week, eat plenty of fruit and never ever would she eat while watching tv or ipad, since eating should be a lovely social experience.
Hah.
Fast forward two years. The Toddler is quite a good eater. She likes her broccoli and salad, but somehow she has learned to adore ice cream, cereal, chocolate and juice. And never mind the tv and iPad. The absolutely best way to make her eat anything is to knock her mind off with endless run of Kaapo from iPad.
Who is to blame? Mostly me. I could not give up my daily chocolate habit, so she learned that going to a store means having a chocolate bar. I only give her a small piece of the good thing, but that is enough for a habit to develop. Somewhere along my triple pregnancy I was too nauseated to find any healthy choice for the evening porridge, so she learned to eat cereal. Around the same time she learned that ice cream exists, since giving it to her made it possible for me to lay down for 10 minutes in peace and quiet.
So the lesson is: First, if you want your child to eat healthy, you must give up vices yourself, or at least never ever eat them in front of your kiddo. Second, be well rested, so you have the sense of humour and determination to fight off your kid's strong will when it comes to all things sugary.

Product tip of the day: The Toddler hates all lotions and creams. That is why we love Moomin sun block lotion, http://www.apteekkituotteet.fi/Muumi-aurinkosuojavoide-SK-50-200-ml. For some reason lotion becomes fun, once we say that "Moomin wants you to wear it."

Friends too busy to be friends

When I was in 16th week of my triple pregnancy, I was put in the bed-rest due to bleeding caused by hematoma. Official bed-rest lasted for about one month, and by then my belly started to be so big and other pregnancy symptoms, such as ligament pains, so hard that I have mostly stayed laying down anyway. I can walk about 100 meters and stay standing up about 5 minutes without getting contractions.This means I am rather restricted when it comes to social life, never mind how lonely I do get while staring at the wall in front of the couch.
This situation has made evaluate my friendships. The outcome is surprising. Many people have been very caring whom I never thought would give a rats ass about my situation. Then there has been those, who are simply too busy.
I used to be too busy myself. Running between work meetings, social gatherings and exercise classes I probably let down many people who were on "time-out" and asked for my company. I do regret that a lot, now. It really hurts when someone you have considered as your best of friends is suddenly too busy even to text you.
I guess that tells you all about the worth of that friendship, then.

Product tip of the day: I've used these perfect tops by Mamalicious everyday in my both pregnancies. Can't praise them enough! http://mamalicious.com/mama-licious/tops-s-s/new-heal-top-box/20000975,en_GB,pd.html?dwvar_20000975_colorPattern=20000975_FusionCoral_342007&forceScope=.

sheryl sandberg - the poor woman!

I am finally reading Sheryl Sandberg's, the chief operating officer of Facebook's, much acclaimed book Lean In. The book is supposedly encouraging for women and promotes gender equality at the workplace and at home.
I haven't finished the book, but I already do feel sorry for Sandberg. The poor woman had to work, in what I presume is rather tight schedule since she's at Facebook, through nine months of morning sickness.
Now, that is not gender equality nor something to boast about. I bet that if the roles would be reversed and it would be men who'd be throwing up all day long - or even once a day - while growing a human being inside of them, they'd be offered a full-paid leave from work and plenty of respect.
After first child Sandberg was clearly too afraid to commit to maternity leave for, let's see, three months! Well, here in Finland many mothers stay at home on parental leave for three years.
I do feel sorry for Sandberg and other women who feel the pressure to rush through the motherhood. True gender equality would mean accepting the fact that pregnancy and transition to motherhood are hard processes, which are worth taking the time.
And yes, yes. Now someone must be saying "what about the father?!"
My answer is that the father can never be a mother. Let's celebrate the motherhood for once.

Product tip of the day:
Our toddler, and I, adore the summer shoes by Cienta. Check them out at cienta.es or if you are Finnish, at minimono.fi.

First: Few things about me and this blog

I am a mother of four. The toddler girl was born in 2012, the triplet boys 2014.
This blog was born as I realised, I will be staying at home for a while now, and I do miss some key aspects of my career as a journalist: meeting people, being i n touch with the world of news and new products and having a place to comment and express myself.
The title of the blog, Scandihousewife, tells you that I come from Scandinavia. More in detail, I live in a small Finnish town, in a smallish townhouse, with my hubby, the toddler and the yet to be born triplets. I write in English, as I hope to gain readers from outside the borders of my country.
The topics in my blog will wary from politics to everyday childcare, but they are all topics that touch the family life somehow.
I write about my family, but in order to protect their privacy, will not post photos. Also, to confuse things, i will write somewhere between the truth and the fiction. Call it literacy blog, if you will.
I will not present products in my blog. But i love shopping and I genuinely want to tell people about products that are worthwhile purchasing.  For that follow my other blog, www.whatabrand.blogspot.fi.
If you wish to contact me, please do e-mail at scandihousewife@gmail.com.